my part that convinces me that i don’t deserve what i want

in my sleep i met up with my part that convinces me that i don’t deserve what i want.

she was like a tree branch stuck in the riverbank. a bit ugly but not overly frightening.

we had a discussion during which she told me i didn’t deserve things i wanted because of horrible things i had done.

and i accepted that. even tho there was no mention of what those horrible things were.

this morning i thought oh wow. this relates to my 6 yr old self fearing that she would blow apart her family if she chose/pursued what she wanted.

i created my ‘you don’t deserve” part to help me not pursue what i wanted.

“you don’t deserve aspect’s taunt of “you don’t deserve b’cos of heinous things you have done” is a LIE.

something she & i made up to keep me from choosing what i want and believing i deserved it.

About sharon-clark-rowlands

Sharon Clark Rowlands is the author of “Oh, We Should Have Told You” which is the outgrowth of a Journal kept during several years spent in the pursuit of personal growth and spirituality. The book contains both personal experiences and “messages from someone outside of myself” and will stimulate you to reflect upon and to gain insights into your own experiences and provide you with inspiration and comfort as you navigate your own Spiritual Journey. view Sharon's author page at http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/SharonsStore and her facebook page for her book https://www.facebook.com/Oh-We-Should-Have-Told-You-111028689006524/
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